Piggy Can't Deicide (Please Read Desc.)

All My Links

So as I mentioned in my last photo, I was thinking of bringing back my CPTSD theme, well, I also was considering writing Trigger Warning after the title, but then again you've already seen the photo, so, err, yea... however, that said, this shit needs to be spoken about, ***Trigger Warning*** below...

Please Note: This is all about education, awareness and support, it is not meant for sympathy or anything else on those lines.

The subject here is perhaps one of the most horrible symptoms concerning CPTSD (Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), that is, Suicide Ideation, that is to become obsessed over the consideration of committing suicide, it works like intrusive thoughts but whilst they can be random, these versions are fixating upon the one subject matter. Many a time I was trapped into this form of thinking, my own personal methodology differed but on one particularly horrifying night, I ended up in intensive care after a failed OD, and other attempts through the years that landed me in psyche wards, often arriving in handcuffs in the back of an ambulance under the escort of less than sympathetic police officers.

One of the most hardest and cruellest aspects of Suicide Ideation, is when in the actual act, if the thoughts have driven one to it, is the locked in combination of suffering Depression and Anxiety at the same time, picture this; two tornadoes one clockwise, one anti clockwise and you are caught emotionally between the two, so thus the depression tells you to do it, that you're worthless, life is shit, etc, but the Anxiety tells you that you are too afraid, you don't know what's on the otherside, there's no turning back, on and on it spins around in your head. Ultimately the anxiety can be your best friend and pulls one back at the last moment, thank god!

I never succeeded, obviously, but fuck me I came close and I would strongly advise, if you are feeling this way, you speak to someone, you have every right to live. Remember, it's truly an emotional bluff (as big and convincing as it may seem), you are better than your thoughts and you are a hero for coming this far, having ever faced such a battle, never, ever give in to it my dear friend. It's actually because you just want the goddamn pain to stop, it can, and it will!

Think of it like this, so many people before you have been there, survived and thereafter life got beautiful for them, you are no exception from that miracle, I am living proof. Now I use my experience to guide others as I hope I am doing here. You live in a universe of infinite possibilities and life can still surprise you. Believe that!

I hope everyone is well and so as always, thank you! :)

PS: If however you are getting to that point, please consider going here...

blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines/

Taken in: Germany / Brandenburg / Landkreis Oder-Spree / Storkow (show map)

Taken on: June 2, 2024

Tags:

CPTSD

Mental-Health

Complex-Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder

Monochrome

Blackandwhite

BlackWhite

WhiteBlack

Suicide

Dont-Do-It

Dark

Dark-Atmosphere

Darker

Darkest

Darkness

Suicide-Ideation

Ideation

GetHelp

Storkow

Storkowmark

Brandeburg

Germany

Deutschland

Bedroom

Lights

Piggy

Trauma

Depression

ANxiety

Alcohol

Alcoholic

Addict

Intrusive-Thoughts

Obsession

Obsessive

Psyche-Ward

Psychological

Psychology

Nikon

18-55mm

Nikkor

Noise

Shadow

Shadows

Shadowy

PTSD

RobinShepperson

RobinSheppersonPhotography

Gun

Weapon « less

Sets appears in: • CPTSD

Groups appears in: • White and Black • 1000 Views more » • White and Black Photography • Views: 2000 • Favorites: 70 • 50 faves (No SL/computer generated images please). • Digital Black and White (2 per day: no nudity: no colour) • 1,100 Plus View Club • I Love Black and White! • ..:: I LOVE DARK PHOTOS ::.. • White/Black • High-Contrast Black & White (No Color, No Sepia) • black, white, and gray photography • The Best of Black & White ☯ • Best Images In Black And White • 750 Views Unlimited • 1000 and more emotions - MORE THAN 1000 VIEWS 📷🏆 • 1000+ views (No people, please) • 100 Views Unlimited • 200 Views Unlimited • 1,000 Views Unlimited 1000 • 500 Views Unlimited • 2,000 Views Unlimited 2000 • 300 Views Unlimited • 400 Views Unlimited • 800 Views Unlimited • 900 Views Unlimited • 600 Views Unlimited • 700 Views Unlimited • 1,500 Views Unlimited 1500 • *MADE IN GERMANY* • Black white and grey • ♥ GERMANY »Ⓓ« DEUTSCHLAND ♥ • Dark Subjects of the Realm • Flickr Social • M.I.G.: Made in Germany! (No 30/60 limit) • ARTBWBTRA - ART IN BLACK AND WHITE - SELECTIVE COLOR - MONOTONE • Le Blanc et le Noir ne s'épousent-ils pas ? • Shades of Gray, The Black and White Photographer • Black & White Realms • flickr portrait • 2.000 / 2000 views at least (NO LIMITS, NO 30/60) • 2100 views and more - NO 30/60 - NO SL • 500 views at least (NO LIMITS, NO 30/60) • Black and White Nirvana - No 30/60 Limit • 1.000 / 1000 views at least (NO LIMITS, NO 30/60) • Portraits - World Group [Retratos - Grupo Mundial] • 300 views at least (NO LIMITS, NO 30/60) • Noir Film • blackwhite mono NO 30/60 LIMIT • 400 views at least (NO LIMITS, NO 30/60) • 200 views at least (NO LIMITS, NO 30/60) • 70 faves or more - no 30/60 - no SL - no people • 40 FAVES or more - no 30/60 - no SL - no people • 50, 100, 200, 500, 1.000 favoritas • The Contrast: Black & White • 50 Favorites (No 30/60 Limit) • Black&White - analog&digital - No 30/60 • Potsdam - Germany (No 30/60 limit) • Germany - Pictures (No 30/60 limit) • Black and White World - The Peoples Gallery • 1000 and more dreams 📷🏆 • 50+ Favourites (no 30/60 limit) • 70-79 FAV;NO SL!!!(add 1 - fave 3,without sweeper:-))☻♥☻ • Black&white123 • 30-39 FAV;NO SL!!!(add 1 - fave 3,without sweeper:-))☻♥☻ • portrait special • An Unlimited Black & White Photography Group • Porfolio Black and White 2 • SnaPix & Chill • Portrait Photographer's Style Share... Please read the updated • Surrealism in Black and White • 25 FAVES or more - no 30/60 - no SL • 1,250 Views Unlimited • Portrait Group 2022 • Dark, sinister and unwholesome • Going Mental • 1500 views plus « less

Camera: Nikon D5600, f/29.0, 1/6 sec, 28mm (=42mm), ISO 2000 (more info) (hide info)

Camera:	Nikon D5600
Aperture:	f/29.0
Exposure Time:	0.167 sec (1/6)
Focal Length:	28mm (35mm equivalent: 42mm)
ISO:	2000
Exposure Bias:	0 EV
Flash:	Off, Did not fire
Exposure Program:	Manual
Exposure Mode:	Manual
Metering Mode:	Multi-segment
White Balance:	Manual
Light Source:	Shade
Gain Control:	High gain up
Color Space:	sRGB
Software:	Digital Photo Professional
Show full info

Stats: 2,973 views / 12 comments